Giving Up? Course Not, Just Being An Old Grump!

For the last few weeks I've been very grumpy. In spite of knowing that there are a lot of people worse off than me, I just can't shake off that feeling of no longer being useful. I’m sick of hearing from the government that there are hundreds of jobs available for those who want to work.

Well, thank you Mr Prime Minister - I was in a job before you came into power. A job I had enjoyed for 22 months. I lost my job just one month before my 56th birthday. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to work and I worked very hard. I was working for the Ministry of Transport - yes, the government's transport department - but due to cutbacks introduced by your ministers, my job had to go, and because I was classed as a "contract worker" (my contract was renewed every three months) I didn't qualify for one of those nice humongous pay-offs or qualify for a civil service pension (less than two-years service you see). Though to be fair, I did get an excellent reference!

Well I have spent a year trying to get one of these so-called available jobs. I've being assured by twenty-something (going on ten) recruitment counsellors "Oh no, madam, it has nothing to do with you age, honest - besides ageism is against the law- (said with tongue in cheek). The fact is we just don't have jobs that are worthy of a person with your calibre and qualifications. Erm, have you thought about remarrying?" Say what???

So Mr Prime Minister - I'd welcome any suggestions of how you expect me to work until I'm 70!

To add insult to injury, you are now insisting that people will have to work until they are 70, because there isn't enough money in the state pension coffers. Not only that, women born in 1954 who were expecting to retire and receive their state pension (miniscule as it is) at the age of 60 (I fall into that category), will have to wait an extra two years before they can draw on their pension.




Other disadvantages? I am single ( I was married ) and don't have any children, under pension age so don't qualify for tax credits, pension credits or otherwise. I have to pay full price for my medical prescriptions, I have the same bills everyone else has to pay, utilities, mortgage etc., and to cap it all, I am too 'young' to qualify for certain concessions. I have worked since I was 17 years of age after qualifying as a secretary. I have never been in trouble with the law. Always been polite, considerate and respectful to my elders and generally tried to take care of myself. I have never sponged off the state... I could go on, but I don't want to end up being further categorised as a "moaner"...

As for my writing. I've edited, tweaked, re-read, my stories, but still don't feel they are good enough. Not only that, I keep reading stories, that are winning prizes or turned into sitcoms, and I think, just a minute, they sound familiar, and realise those stories are exactly like mine which I wrote in the 20th Century but were told they weren't good enough! Then, recently (a week ago in this Century), I read an article on how a writer earns £15,000 per year entering competitions. Apparently this writer enters 5 comps per week with prizes between $50 to $500 and aims to win 3 prizes entering one story that won first prize a while ago, which is changed. If this is true, then there is no chance for us mere mortals who are struggling to get past Assignment 2 of an online course! What happened to ethics? Oh I'm sorry, I'm just a grumpy old fashioned moaner... Anyway....

As for my novel - well that's gone on the backburner. I am now the proud owner of a new section in my garden. I call it 'Pauline's Pulp.' Not very inspiring I know, but it will serve as a reminder to me that sometimes in life you have to come to the realisation that a dream is probably not the right one. Then again, it will also remind me that she who believes in herself can move mountains!

I am still smiling, still laughing and yes, I'm still writing... well I have another section in the garden that needs filling up!

Later...